Wednesday, November 12, 2008


Help. I have a lot of it. A ridiculous amount of childcare.

At least I openly acknowledge it: I'm not hypocritically striking an every mom, Wal-Mart wardobe pose while dropping $150K at Saks.

In fact, if I didn't have so much help, I have no idea how my crazy chaotic life would work. Which, of course, makes me drown in a vat of wasp-induced guilt on behalf of all the working moms who do not have access to my level of support.

Frankly, its a pretty big vat - big enough to hold almost every other working mother in the world. I live in a friggin' bubble.

Here's what I have:

- Full-time nanny (who is extraordinary. I am the envy of the playground regulars)
- Au Pair (newly arrived from Brazil)
- Cleaning lady - 2Xs / week
- In Laws in the West Village, who are actually disappointed if they don't get an overnight once a week with the twins. At their house. So they can have 'quality alone time' with the boys. No joke.
- A husband with a (moderately) flexible schedule

Of course I work quite hard, and I have twin 18-month boys who are the personification of chaos, and the reason I have so much help is that two pairs of hands is the best way to keep them from certain death these days, and I constantly race from one thing to the next in hopes of optimizing any and all available time with my children...

But take today. I'm sick. Stomach flu. In fact, it's been an ugly few days: One boy puked all night Sunday. I got sick Monday night. Other boy puked all night last night. I had a relapse this morning. Needless to say, there was quite a foul odor hanging over our household. (Better now, thanks to ventilation and a whole lot of laundry).

So yes, miserable. But the au pair woke up with me at 6 a.m. this morning, and took care of one sick boy while I was sick. The nanny came later and cleaned up all the mess. I was able to stay in bed with no true consequences - no loss of pay or threat of losing my job.

The true super moms are the ones who keep it all together, keep smiling, keep their children safe and fed and happy, without the benefit of a full staff behind them. Who wash the vomit out of their hair, beg a neighbor to watch their sick kid who can't go to day care, and make it to work on time.


Lily Parrot said...

Amazing how that is possible. I'm exhausted just thinking about it.

Giff said...

feel better!

tony d said...

Stop beating yourself up - Mom is hard Working mom is hard - parenting is hard. My mother use to stay when I aksed her how she did it (single working Mom - 3 kids( 2 teeneagers) "You do what you have to do". Sounds like your doing it!!

Your Fave Asst :) said...

We had that same flu last week - both Jeff & I. I can't imagine being a mom and going through that - it was violent. You are an amazing person. Your blog says it all !!!

The coolest thing about being sick last week . . . Zakk was by my side the whole time. He was protecting me :)

Hope you are all better - it was brutal !!! BTW loved the Ally McBeal S&M comment :)